Monday, September 20, 2010
"Love" for me was always overrated. The need of being with someone all the time and when apart the constant wondering what your love is up to and where he is, what he is doing. The desperate feeling of immediately sharing a wonderful experience or news with him or the excitement of meeting him, when you wait for your wall clock to tick away to your desired time.
I remember laughing it off when I use to see others going through this, "what a terrible state of mind" use to be my reaction. And I completely dismissed these feelings of the ones who did felt the same with me. As I was more to them than they were to me. But I was never able to connect with them that deeply even though I stayed in the relationship sometimes for their sake sometimes for the sake of the useless habit of seeing them in my life day in and day out.
Ironically now finding myself in the same situation, I hear the distant laugh of the people, the ones who are already way ahead than me in this journey. Feeling, what I feel every second of the day for you, I cannot fathom why "love" should not be overrated.
With your presence in my life my past seems so lifeless. With your presence in my days my past days looks like a dark night. With your presence in my nights I never knew that darkness could be filled with shine. I can never say now I regret the time we saw each other on that first night.
As you take my hand I get pulled towards life. As you hold me I can feel freedom from the invisible bonds of my past. I wonder now, is this what they termed as "Love" & I wonder is it here to last. I asked you that day "what it is?" you replied almost spontaneously saying "Love, what else do you think" as you smiled that killing smile.
In your eyes promises I do see. In your words calmness and peace I do feel. In your presence the clouds from eclipse disperses leaving me to bath under the rays of your love. I wonder if this is the love I do feel I wonder is this the Love I did see. Sharing words with you is always comforting, I never knew sharing silence could be so fulfilling. Why in your arms I do feel complete. Why without you my days are so obsolete.
Why my heart churns every time I see your name on the incoming call, why I curse the night after biding you goodnight. I wonder how long I will be able to keep this; I wonder how long will it be when it will be your time to leave too.
Love, I understand why you hold me tighter in every meet whispering promises for keeping my clouds of confusion away till we bid. Baby, I understand why you flip when we are apart because you know my way too practical mind will be building dams over my feelings to stop them from pouring. But I want to ask you how can you understand that it’s your hold that is keeping me with you, Baby how could you understand it’s your care and understanding of my mind and soul that I am connected to you so deeply. You asked me that day "So, What do you think it is? As usual my confused soul and practical mind snapped back answering you with another question "Love......is it??? And we laughed together for the hundredth time.
Written By - Ritika Patel