Merry Colors splatter from top to bottom, with a golden frames of perfect mates smiling at each other, happiness content in that momentary snap makes you feel true matches has a way to find itself, such is the effect of matrimony sites on the ones who are gearing up to walk through the narrow end of the funnel, where life will tend to become too focused or will it..…
Beyond the conception of personal or significant, the arranged marriage set up has turned into a nasty business deal more for the stake holders (The anxious Bride’s Party and the Over Confident Groom’s Zone)
So, in this “Arranged” Set up…when exactly things start turning upside down …..
Gone are the days where letters and phone calls were exchanged between parents before the bride and groom will get to see each other, now a days the first thing they do is check their face book profile…as for guys get judged by the number of pictures he is holding a Budweiser and for girls it’s been judge by the length of their clothes…
This is the place where you judge the groom by looking at their picture taken in a distorted angle from their left hand, during one boring afternoon, from their 2 MP camera, for which his parents would think their “Ladla Beta” is looking “soo Cute”(auntiji have a closer look) …
…or a highly cropped version of some outing done ages ago (dude you use to look like that in kindergarten) ….worse are the ones taken at someone else’s wedding, poor bride’s parents needs time to understand probably that’s the only time guys clean up well, (come on … someone else’s wedding … meaning … single giggling girls all around)… but for brides the pictures need to be clearly taken in a traditional outfit in some studio with a “1970’s” expression, otherwise “uncleji would say…uhhmm kuch jum nahi rahi”.
It is the time when Intellectual compatibility, mental and emotional compatibility stands no chance what so ever in front of “Horoscope” compatibility. Once the horoscope match is done, it wouldn’t matter to either parties if the bride and groom would even kill each other, I am sure the best defense they would present in front of a judge would be “Ab kya kar sakte hain humne toh 29 gun milaye the”, and in front of that even the judge will not stand a chance
it reminds me of the time when the Maharaja’s use to sit in their pleasure room and one by one the entertainers would come to please him, similarly the 21st centuries Maharaja (Grooms Zone) just sits there thinking the entertainers(bride’s zone) will be on his mercy(WAKE UP).
These are the times when the traditional mentality of searching an Engineer/ Doctor/IIT/IIM Groom creeps in, whereas the girls education comes next to her ability of negotiating with bhaji wala and making aloo ke parathe...
…And it goes on to the scrutiny of Family’s education to Maternal uncles to paternal uncles, from how many Govt Services to how many defiance services, how many unmarried elder siblings..
How can we forget the big suffocating Money Bet, how much the ”would be” groom is earning now, is then compared to his age, and then the growth rate is calculated, did the parents ever studied so seriously for their Math exams? I wonder!!
And the hurl is choked in your throat when the Mirror Cracking Materials represent their expectation of “Tall” (this is coming from a 5”7 guy), Slim (Coming from a Square Peg), Beautiful (uhh don’t even get me started on this one) HOMELY Girl - Now what in earth does the word “Homely” means????
Because It is absolutely okay if their “munda” is a womanizer and drinks “occasionally” (FYI the occasions occur frequently than weekends), whose FB wall is splattered with 690 “girl” friends, and never would have tried to cook himself a real maggi, and still you would have the neck to ask for a “Homely” Girl?
And for heaven’s sake when did every guy in this world turn into … wait for it …. “friendly”… “Jolly Natured”…. “Fun Loving” and “Understanding” creature …. surprisingly this is "most of the vocabulary" or rather "the only vocabulary" one can find in the "about me" field, and why beacause you might think that girls are just standing on their toes waiting to marry Pooh?
Written By - Behind the Scenes of "Holy" Matrimony !






